Why 'Staying For The Kids' Might Be Doing More Harm Than Good, With Guest Kristy Dyer
June 09, 2025 · 26 min
What happens when parents sacrifice happiness for the illusion of stability?
Kristy Dyer joins Michelle to reflect on her experience growing up in a high-conflict household, and how that shaped her decision to leave a marriage that mirrored those same emotional patterns.
Together, they explore how generational healing begins with honest parenting, and why children need emotionally safe environments more than they need traditional structures.
What You’ll Learn
• The unintended harm of “staying for the kids”
• How emotional labor and perfectionism show up in parenting
• Why transparency and repair matter more than perfection
• Tools for raising emotionally safe children after separation
• The importance of healing generational trauma through co-parenting
Episode Highlights
03:02 – Kristy’s childhood: blended family, absent father
07:40 – The burden of perfectionism and emotional labor
12:15 – Repeating childhood patterns in adult relationships
15:50 – Reframing “starter marriages” and shame
22:12 – Building trust through repair after separation
Meet Kristy Dyer
Kristy is a co-parenting mom of three raising her children with honesty, healing, and courage. Her journey of breaking generational cycles offers insight for parents navigating divorce and reparenting themselves in the process.
Final Thought
“Your kids don’t need you to stay. They need you to heal.”
Want to learn more?
Explore Michelle's courses on kids & divorce:
How to Talk to Kids About Divorce
Building Resilience: Helping Children to Adapt and Thrive After Divorce
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Read the full transcript
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