Crime Drama Queens

Send us a textWelcome to our first episode recorded face to face, in the same room rather than hundreds of miles apart! We had a WONDERFUL time, although the benefit to you is nil. The sound quality is patchy (we had tried for a studio but it was Good Friday and everything was closed) as we were in Lily's airbnb room, and we are horribly hungover as we had been out celebrating Lex's birthday the night before. Having said that, we talk all things Case Histories, from the flawed, if highly appealing, main detective, to the conjoined cases he solves, lost cats, dead dogs, death by axe, death by accidental neck slashes, and religious visions on the side. Lily LOVED it, but when all's said and done, Lex would have preferred to watch Taken. Again. #toteslegitThis podcast contains descriptions of fictionalised violence, and of course, is full of SPOILERS. We don't know what we're doing next - either "Ellis" on C5 in the UK, or "Wycliffe" (ITVX). Something new or something old? Which would you prefer??Find us on Faceook, on Instagram @crimedramaqueens, or email us at crimedramaqueens@gmail.comOriginal artwork by Mike Luckieinstagram.com/mikeluckieillustration/Music: Mystery Box by V. Draganov

Send us a textFirst off, let us apologise for the amount we talk about the weather and various weather apps at the beginning. It's almost like we didn't want to talk about Rosemary and Thyme. Almost. But we do get into it, and what towering achievment of television it isn't. There are two people shot dead, some extortion, terrible wallpapering, a menace on wheels, our heros merrily encouraging toxic relationships, and a three legged dog that gets the blame. Oh, and the MISSING CURRY PLANTS! SOUND THE ALARUMS, WE HAVE PLANT THEFT! So, enjoy. As much as you can. Even Felicity Kendal and Pam Ferris can't save this one. This podcast contains descriptions of fictionalised violence, and, of course, is full of SPOILERS.Our next episode will be on "Case Histories" season one, episodes one and two. This is available on U (freeview channel and app) in the UK and on Acorn TV elsewhere. Find us on Facebook, on Instagram @crimedramaqueens, or email us at crimedramaqueens@gmail.com Original artwork by Mike Luckieinstagram.com/mikeluckieillustration/Music: Mystery Box by V. Draganov

Send us a textIt's another Agatha Christie! Drink every time Lily says "I know we're not talking about the book, but..." Actually, don't, that would be dangerous. Protect the NHS.We had some dramas while recording this episode as a plusnet engineer started drilling into Lily's house, and then the internet cut out so she had to drive across town to keep recording elsewhere. But don't worry, we've cut all that from the edit...we had to, otherwise this episode would have been as long as Towards Zero itself, and if you've watched it, you'll know that's looooong. There's plenty to enjoy though, if like fabulous clothes, sets, lingering stares, and dodgy lipstick. And who doesn't?We find out more about Lex's exes, her try scoring celebration routine, and how she identifies herself as "just a person watching a thing." Lily, on the other hand, doesn't need to identify herself as anything. You can make your own assumptions about her as she hisses "genius" aggressively when talking about her pal, Agatha. #totallylegitThis podcast contains descriptions of fictionalised violence, and, of course, is full of SPOILERS.Our next episode will be on "Rosemary and Thyme" season three, episode five, "Three Legs Good." This is available on ITVX in the UK and on BritBox elsewhere. Find us on Facebook, on Instagram @crimedramaqueens, or email us at crimedramaqueens@gmail.com Original artwork by Mike Luckieinstagram.com/mikeluckieillustration/Music: Mystery Box by V. Draganov

Send us a textEnter stage left: A tall, pale, man in a deerstalker. Spry, and somewhat unnerving, Jeremy Brett is to some people (Lily), but not others (Lex), the definitive Sherlock Holmes. It's not an absolute belter of a episode though as an intervention by a couples therapist would have perhaps been more suitable to the problem at hand. Lex bemoans the lack of brouhaha, but at least we have dancing stick figures, a head of hair that seems to grow like expanding foam, and some of the most extraordinary facial hair ever to grace our TV screens. We did it, so it's done. This podcast contains descriptions of fictionalised violence, and, of course, is full of SPOILERS.Our next episode will be on "Towards Zero" (the new one). This is available on BBC IPlayer in the UK, and will be available on Britbox in the US and Canada from April 16th. Find us on Facebook, on Instagram @crimedramaqueens, or email us at crimedramaqueens@gmail.com Original artwork by Mike Luckieinstagram.com/mikeluckieillustration/Music: Mystery Box by V. Draganov

Send us a textKenneth Branagh shines in this anglicised version of the skandi noir classic, Wallander. However, it's not that hard to shine when everything around you is so incredibly bleak. Having said that, there are lots of bodies, and one of them is even heavily charred, while the others are axed and scalped, so plenty to enjoy on that front. We we also have dodgy eye shadow (sorry, Linda), a pair of shittens (sorry, Linda), and a very unfortunate face mask. We quite enjoyed this, but if you are feeling a bit hollowed out by life, Wallander might be one to miss. You could always watch "Dead Again" instead. HIGHLY recommended. Please listen for full synopsis. This podcast contains descriptions of fictionalised violence, and, of course, is full of SPOILERS.Our next episode will be on "Sherlock Holmes" (the Jeremy Brett version), season one, episode two, "The Dancing Men." This is available on ITVX in the UK, and Amazon Prime and Apple TV elswhere in the world. Find us on Facebook, on Instagram @crimedramaqueens, or email us at crimedramaqueens@gmail.com Original artwork by Mike Luckieinstagram.com/mikeluckieillustration/Music: Mystery Box by V. Draganov

Send us a textSilly hats, squabbling academics, tudor costumes, death by antique sword...what can we say? Just the usual antics in the world of crime drama. We've seen all these things before but this time we are in the world of Father Brown. It's not the greatest introduction to the world of G.K. Chesterton's crime solving priest, but if you are into secret codes and battle reinactments, you are in for a treat. Apologies for the weird knocking sounds. Both our tracks, recorded on different devices, several hundred miles apart, had strange knockings sounds throughout. We've removed them as much as possible, but, as ever, we don't really know what we're doing. I suspect the ghost of G.K. Chesterton might have been trying to reach us...This podcast contains descriptions of fictionalised violence, and, of course, is full of SPOILERS.Our next episode will be on "Wallander" (the Kenneth Brannagh version), season one, episode one, "Sidetracked." This is available on BBC Iplayer in the UK, and Britbox and PBS in the US. Find us on Facebook, on Instagram @crimedramaqueens, or email us at crimedramaqueens@gmail.com Original artwork by Mike Luckieinstagram.com/mikeluckieillustration/Music: Mystery Box by V. Draganov

Send us a textYork, present day: A woman is found dead inside a dinosaur exhibit. Not inside the exhibit, you understand.  Not wodged in with the dinosaurs. Only a total fool would think that. And she drowned....OR DID SHE?Well, Patience, our eagle eyed investigative consultant, knows that she did. And Patience leads our professional detectives gently through the clues of dino bones, dodgy tattoos, and google maps. We follow along too, getting occasionally distracted by men named Russell, Lex dressing up as a baguette and/or a tudor cook, and a handsome, if smug, museum director. Happy days!This podcast contains descriptions of fictionalised violence, and, of course, is full of SPOILERS. Our next episode will be on Father Brown, season twelve, episode one, "The Battle of Kembleford." This is available on BBC Iplayer in the UK, and on Britbox and Amazon Prime in the US, and elsewhere in the world. Original artwork by Mike Luckieinstagram.com/mikeluckieillustration/Music: Mystery Box by V. Draganov

Send us a textA woman has been clubbed in the head with a toffee hammer, but it's ok, as she was "clubbable," and probably deserved it. Oh, and the clowns in Brussels have got rid of toffee hammers so maybe she was shot instead. Confused?Welcome to the world of Detective Superintendent Andy Dalziel! He's assisted by Detective Sergeant Peter Pascoe, who has the audacity to be university educated, and is VERY smug about it. It's the 90s so buckle up! We have a rugby club, hookers that hook, sex pests, flashing, a peeping tom, a welshman sobbing to "The Green Green Grass of Home," a killer that can bend time, and of course, that iconic couple, Dick and Joy. This podcast contains descriptions of fictionalised violence, and is, of course, full of SPOILERS. Our next episode will be on "Patience," season one, episode three, "The Missing Link." This is available on Channel 4 catch up in the UK, but it looks like you'll need a VPN elsewhere in the world. Original artwork by Mike Luckieinstagram.com/mikeluckieillustration/Music: Mystery Box by V. Draganov

Send us a textHello all, here we are again. Quick update to let you know we're binning off Father Brown as the episode we were going to talk about is no longer avilable on "U" and we can't find it anywhere else. After all that fuss about finding the app and stuff. Tsk. Anyway, we've decided to do something else.  The something else: "Dalziel and Pascoe," season one, episode one, "A Clubbable Woman." Yes, a woman gets clubbed to death. It is available in the UK on BBC Iplayer and ITVX, and on Prime, Britbox, and Apple TV elsewhere in the world. One day, Father Brown, one day. Original artwork by Mike Luckieinstagram.com/mikeluckieillustration/Music: Mystery Box by V. Draganov

Send us a textThere's no full length episode this week because Christmas and New Year threw us off our stride. Come on now, take a deep breath and wipe your tears - we'll get one to you soon. In this little minisode Lily tries to do a short review of the crime dramas and murder mysteries on offer this Christmas, but without Lex to gently rein her in, gets slightly distracted. Happy New Year!  ***UPDATE***  Our next episode will NOT be on Father Brown, season five, episode two, "The Labyrinth of the Minotaur," as stated by Lily because it is no longer available for free online. Instead we will be looking at "Dalziel and Pascoe" season one, episode one, "A Clubbable Woman." This is available on BBC Iplayer, and ITVX in the UK, and on Britbox, Prime, and Apple TV elsewhere in the world. Original artwork by Mike Luckieinstagram.com/mikeluckieillustration/Music: Mystery Box by V. Draganov